I love having a little prince around the house. Bryson brings so much happiness to our home and Lord knows there is never a dull moment with that kid. I love each one of our kids and they each have their own personality and individuality that makes my life that much happier.

So, Bryson is 3 1/2 and his speech is improving (i worry that he may need to have speech classes but his pre-school teacher is "observing" this for me) but a lot of times just us immediate family can pick up on exactly what he is saying and there are times we aren't sure either :) nonetheless, since he does have 2 older sisters that like to speak for him and are really like 2 other mothers the kid doesn't really stand a chance!

It's quite adorable watching the girls with him. They are very defensive of him and they love it when they are the one who has taught him something new! If I have to close at work, I love to come home to find all three of the kids snuggled up in one bed fast asleep. Usually one of them is turned in an odd direction while another has an arm thrown over another. These are moments that i stand in their doorway and just watch. Priceless. I will never get these back. Sometimes while standing there I just say a quick thank you Lord prayer for these children and for allowing me to be the chosen one to be their mother. I feel so blessed. At other times I laugh and think how uncomfortable they must be but yet they do it every night, willingly. They have their own beds but just choose to sleep all together. kids. they are so funny!

Natalie, my 9 yr. old still likes to play with her barbies and recently Bryson has discovered that he does too. ha. i think it is so cute. the other day; however, Bryson was carrying a naked barbie out to the car as we are getting ready to go to school. I didn't want to get him all riled up before school by telling him no so, i thought "he will put her down in the car and forget all about her before we even get to school". as we are getting into the van Bryson is heading to the back of the van and i explain to him that we are in a hurry and he needs to get in his seat so we can go bye bye. He defensively tells me that he has to buckle up girlfriend! as i try not to laugh so hard he buckles up girlfriend and gets in his seat. when we get to school he does not forget and yells at me as i am getting him out of the car that he has to unbuckle girlfriend. he fortunately doesn't throw a fit when i tell him he can see girlfriend when he gets out of school......boy, i didn't think i had to worry about girlfriends for a long time!

praising god during economic hardships

while, i know that everybody has a story of how the economy is affecting them, i didn't realize (really) how it could affect Travis and i until it did. i guess because we don't invest in the stock market or anything i just naively assumed that we really wouldn't be affected by this "slump" that our economy is facing. i know, i am not a realist at times or i just don't want to think about the possibility of "what could happen".
this week Travis learned he was going to receive a 5% decrease in his pay (his hourly wage) due to cutbacks his company is making . this may not sound like much but it really hit home for me. your deducting someones pay that has worked and supported your co. for 10 years and has invested and dedicated his time ...etc.is what i am thinking as travis is telling me the news! i am thankful he has a job and it could have been worse i suppose but i was very surprised! the timing could have been better. this week i received my e.r. bill (went in to discover i had kidney stones) $800!! and we do have insurance. 80/20 like most people. then the same day we got my er bill Natalie had her tonselectomy....$750.00.
after all of this i am trying to figure out in what areas can we cut back in and /or be more frugal. i know that there are many but doing it and putting it into action is a different story.

however; on the positive side, (the side where god gets the glory and honor) i was offered a promotion and raise at my job this week. i honestly feel that god will always supply your needs. i am praising god for all that he does. my heart is heavy for all of those that are going through lay-offs and cant find a job.

have you ever been in a dark room trying to find something without the light on? or you need a light but cant find the switch? or have you ever been in a haunted house where you are in one of those pitch dark rooms and in order to get to the next room you have to find the one and only exit door. the one that seems nearly impossible to find because you cant even see your hand in front of your face because of the darkness!

imagine this: you're in a haunted house. the "haunted" is your past, the unknown, your failures, your uncertainties, the things around you that you feel you have no control of. the house is your life.

to get into the haunted house you have to stand in a long line most of the time. you will pay a certain price. you will chat amongst others who are waiting. usually you go with friends or a group. as you're in line you will see some that are running out screaming in fear, some are being chased, and then there are those who walk out as if nothing is wrong.

you arrive inside the haunted house. at first you are a little anxious because you don't know what is about to happen or what you are about to go through to get back on the outside of the haunted house, and there are people starring at you; weird people. you are clutching to the ones you are with. you come to a place where it is no longer possible to hold on to those that are with you. the space is too tight and you must enter alone. you are really scared at this point. there are so many noises and people that seem like they want to harm you. you journey on through this haunted house. you have went through so many mazes, dark places, tunnels, and then you reach the dark room!

inside of the dark room you start to feel a little claustrophobic, like all of the air is being sucked out of the room. you are holding your arms out in front of you reaching....for something. anything. you cant see a thing. this is irritating. you ask yourself " why cant i find the door"? i have been around this entire room it seems a million times!" you keep searching. waiting to hear someone say its over here. come this way. follow my voice. finally that voice comes.

as you make your way to the voice and into the next room, your eyes are blurred and you vision is sketchy. the lights are dancing and you re still inside.

sometimes our life is like going through this mentioned haunted house: you don't know what to expect, you will meet people along the way.you will drift away from some and you will lose some. some people that god allows in your life are just meant for a season and some are meant for a lifetime. life will give you mazes and some will be harder to find your way out of than others. you will at some point in your life experience the dark room maybe a few. this is the point in your life when nothing seems to be coming together and you don't know which way to turn. you will eventually find yourself in the next phase of your life....as long as you follow the voice. the voice that knows your name. the voice that can speak peace into your life and then there is immediate peace. the voice that can lead you through all circumstances.

my prayer is that i will continue to learn to hear god's amazing voice and that i will be available for those who might be in the "room" behind me that needs a friends voice and guidance to help get them through. this past year was the most difficult year and i am sure glad that god can make all things new again.

just trying to live under gods grace and mercy and find comfort in his arms!